If you want riches, you must refuse to accept any circumstance that leads toward poverty.
I love this statement. The realization is that since I do not have riches (as in money), then I still have some poverty locked in my mind somewhere, although my belief is that I am flushing it out. My thought is that ‘I am better than yesterday, but not as good tomorrow.’ I’m definitely growing and my life is proof of that.
“You will get all you want in life, if you help enough other people get what they want.” – Zig Ziglar
Planning what to do IF AND WHEN OVERTAKEN BY FAILURE, INSTEAD OF BURNING ALL BRIDGES AND MAKING RETREAT IMPOSSIBLE.
A bit of a stinger (albeit bittersweet) is that I purposely burned my ships. I came to the Philippines to build my business, and I failed at two attempts. This is growing, I am making progress (with the help of this group and my burning tenacity to not give up and not quit on my kids, as ultimate failure is quitting. I’m not going to quit).
Money is only clam shells or metal discs or scraps of paper, and there are treasures of the heart and soul which money cannot buy, but most people, being broke, are unable to keep this in mind and sustain their spirits. When a man is down and out and on the street, unable to get any job at all, something happens to his spirit which can be observed in the droop of his shoulders, the set of his hat, his walk and his gaze. He cannot escape a feeling of inferiority among people with regular employment, even though he knows they are definitely not his equals in character, intelligence or ability.
I’ve seen this and experienced a taste of it. There’s a definite feeling of overwhelming sadness. I’m grateful to have only momentarily camped out there, some make that their home. For them, leaving that mental place is extremely difficult and takes a long time for them to accomplish. Oddly enough, I just spoke to two guys I’d assisted for a time. One is doing well, has a job and is slowly moving up. He used to live in the woods by the University in Arlington. Another guy is in Las Vegas now, he’s still struggling but he’s doing better than when he was in Texas. It’s refreshing to see that there is change for even the most negative of minds and lifestyles.
Fear of Criticism
LACK OF POISE. Expressed through lack of voice control, nervousness in the presence of others, poor posture of body, poor memory.
This is something I definitely have struggles with. I take time to learn the groups for really showing my colors. I’ve been through my fair share of abuse growing up, not going to get in some pity party of one, but I would be ignorant to say that it didn’t have an effect on me and my natural character. I do better in one-on-one situations, that doesn’t seem to be an issue there. However, in larger groups, my tendency is to be a bit more shy. Poor memory is a big deal, too. My posture is something of an issue that I’ve been constantly addressing. Back straight, shoulders back, standing like a superhero, that exhibits confidence (see the TedTalk by Amy Cuddy, which I have mentioned in previous weeks lessons).
LACK OF AMBITION. Mental and physical laziness, lack of self-assertion, slowness in reaching decisions, easily influenced by others, the habit of criticizing others behind their backs and flattering them to their faces, the habit of accepting defeat without protest, quitting an undertaking when opposed by others, suspicious of other people without cause, lacking in tactfulness of manner and speech, unwillingness to accept the blame for mistakes.
I notated this simply because I allow myself to be influenced by others if it makes sense. I’m not the kind of guy to take financial advice from a homeless man, nor construction advice from someone who doesn’t know what a hammer is… however, if they are getting the results (success) in areas that I need assistance in, I am definitely willing to test it out to see if it works. That may place me in the area of “lack of ambition” – I don’t waste time criticizing others, nor do I feel I am flattering towards people. I do have the habit of accepting defeat too quickly, which has been something I have noticed and have already taken steps towards overcoming that. And I think if anything, I am too quick to take the blame on things. I see that as if it is my fault, then I control it and thus I can fix it. If it is someone else’s fault, then it is their responsibility to fix it.
The Power of Suggestion:
During the “flu” epidemic which broke out during the world war, the mayor of New York City took drastic steps to check the damage which people were doing themselves through their inherent fear of ill health. He called in the newspaper men and said to them, “Gentlemen, I feel it necessary to ask you not to publish any scare headlines concerning the ‘flu’ epidemic. Unless you cooperate with me, we will have a situation which we cannot control.” The newspapers quit publishing stories about the “flu,” and within one month the epidemic had been successfully checked.
I just thought this such an interesting thing – the power of suggestion. People see it, worry about it, and then manifest it for themselves…
Disappointments in business and in love stand at the head of the list of causes of fear of ill health. A young man suffered a disappointment in love which sent him to a hospital. For months he hovered between life and death. A specialist in suggestive therapeutics was called in. The specialist changed nurses, placing him in charge of a very charming young woman who began (by prearrangement with the doctor) to make love to him the first day of her arrival on the job.
Was this legal??? I almost want to apologize for including this, but this just is a very bizarre thing.
SELF-CODDLING. The habit of making a bid for sympathy, using imaginary illness as the lure. (People often resort to this trick to avoid work). The habit of feigning illness to cover plain laziness, or to serve as an alibi for lack of ambition.
This was DEFINITELY something I used to do. I would call in sick and about an hour later I’m “miraculously cured”… something that happened while I was in school and carried over to the 9 to 5 jobs I had… the last several years prior to the Philippines, I didn’t see that as much in my character. I worked on natural diets and found countless ways to spark energy. I even fasted for 34-35 days without solid food and maintained my two jobs just fine.
If death is not mere change, or transition, then nothing comes after death except a long, eternal, peaceful sleep, and sleep is nothing to be feared. Thus you may wipe out, forever, the fear of Death.
This is something that really rings true to me. The Bible actually refers to this a lot, such as Matthew 9:24 Jesus said, “Go away. The girl is not dead but asleep.” But they laughed at him. And Acts 7:60 “Lord, do not hold this sin against them.” When he had said this, he (Stephen) fell asleep. And it’s in other places. Personally, it’s a very comforting thing.
Even a dog or a horse knows when its master lacks courage; moreover, a dog or a horse will pick up the vibrations of fear thrown off by its master, and behave accordingly. Lower down the line of intelligence in the animal kingdom, one finds this same capacity to pick up the vibrations of fear. A honey-bee immediately senses fear in the mind of a person—for reasons unknown, a bee will sting the person whose mind is releasing vibrations of fear, much more readily than it will molest the person whose mind registers no fear.
Fear is connected stress which is exhibited by Cortisol in the brain. Most creatures seem to have a stronger sense of smell that humans. Just a thought when I saw this.
His decision to trust his own judgment has already piled up a fortune far greater than the next five generations of his descendents can squander. For the benefit of those seeking vast riches, let it be remembered that practically the sole difference between Henry Ford and a majority of the more than one hundred thousand men who work for him, is this-FORD HAS A MIND AND CONTROLS IT, THE OTHERS HAVE MINDS WHICH THEY DO NOT TRY TO CONTROL.
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. (Philippians 4:8) – the Bible states we should have a positive mind. The only way to do that is to control it, control the thoughts. Personally speaking, I have much better days when I keep the mess between my ears focused on positive things, focused on gratitude and helping others.
Building alibis is a deeply rooted habit. Habits are difficult to break, especially when they provide justification for something we do. Plato had this truth in mind when he said, “The first and best victory is to conquer self. To be conquered by self is, of all things, the most shameful and vile.”
I don’t know if you’ve ever played video games that a have race cars. You go around the first lap, you’re completing against other drivers, a big mess if you haven’t the slightest clue to control your car, which usually is me. The game isn’t to see how much you can hit, if it was, I would be the bomb! Anyway, the second lap, you’ve got ghost car, which is what you did on your first lap. As you get better, the third lap, your ghost car is either the first or second lap, whichever had the best time. And I think that’s the ultimate goal. To do better each time. That’s how you conquer self, I would suppose. Find your faults, don’t crucify yourself over them, just change them for the better. There was a game I played may years ago, it was called the Third World War. It was interesting, you could take over the world three different ways, although now I can only recall two. Maybe it was two, I don’t know. One way was by brute force, go in there with your military and take them over. The other way was by economic take over. Just little by little, you slowly influence them with your products and services. Little… by little. It’s an interesting thought on how to approach personal change.
Small font on a word document and it’s three pages. It was also over 30 pages for the chapter… so yeah. A lot to take in. Thanks Bob and Michael for being a blessing to us all.
Johnny Ray (in the Philippines)
P.S. if at first you don’t succeed, get a mentor. :-)